When making a big decision, it can be difficult to know if you’re doing the right thing.
Tensions can be high, feelings muddled. How do you see through the forest of trees to the other side?
Will you regret this?
Are you doing the right thing?
Do you quit or push forward?
The questions are endless. You’ll drive yourself crazy going round and round and never getting anywhere.
So, what do you do?
What’s Best for You?
When making a big decision, first look at what’s best for you.
Other people will be affected by your decision, it’s true. Your kids, or spouse, or coworkers.
But other people aren’t the ones bearing the brunt of that decision. They won’t get to the end of their lives and own the decision made in that moment. You will.
Will you die with regrets, or feel proud you tried?
What’s best for you in this choice?
It doesn’t really matter what the choice is. Maybe you’re thinking of getting a new job, or of breaking up with your spouse, or moving somewhere new.
Looking forward to your dream life, what do you see? Who are you with? What job do you have? Where are you?
Look forward to the life that would make you happy and start walking towards it.
People Will Judge You
You might as well prepare yourself for the trash talk. It’s coming.
No matter which way you choose, there will be someone that thinks it’s the wrong choice and will judge you for it.
But it really doesn’t matter who judges you.
They want you to make a decision that is comfortable for THEIR lives, not your own.
It’s your job to make the choice that takes you where YOU want to be. Not where others want you to be.
They’ll stare at you in disbelief. Let them. Do it anyway.
It Won’t Be Easy
I’m not saying it’ll be easy to brush off all opinions.
Some of those opinions are important to you.
People will be hurt by your choices.
But if you don’t make the choice, you’ll be the one hurting. The one dying on the inside. Struggling with indecision or living a lie.
You get one chance at this life thing. I feel like I say that a lot. But it’s true. One chance. Make it everything you want it to be.
Do the things that matter to you, the things your soul is screaming for.
The things that send shivers up your spine and fill your stomach with happy butterflies. The things that bring tears to your eyes because they matter so much.
That’s what life is about. Those moments that touch your soul.
You Know What to Do
You know what to do, what the right choice is.
Think I’m wrong?
Try this, you have Choice A and Choice B.
Maybe you think you don’t know which to pick.
Now what if I told you to pick Choice B?
That’s the one. Pick it. No more questions, that’s the right path.
How did your gut feel when I said that, when you imagine that? Was their disappointment or excitement?
Try Choice A now. That’s the choice. Really imagine it.
How does it feel knowing that’s the choice you make for the rest of your life?
That’s the choice you’ll make and look back on from your death bed.
If it’s not a yes, it’s a no.
If you can walk away without much trouble, it’s not where you’re supposed to be.
After you’ve walked away, if you feel like a piece of you is missing, there’s always a way back. And if there isn’t a way back, it’s not where you belong.
You can’t mess up something meant for you.
Stop Worrying
It’s pointless to worry if the choice you make is the right one.
All you can do is the best you can do in this moment. Right now.
You have no way of predicting the future, so stop trying.
When it’s meant for you, you can’t mess it up.
It’ll work out. Unless it’s not meant for you, in which case it won’t.
Maybe you think that’s easy for me to say. But I’ve blown up my whole life, several times.
Screwed the whole thing up. Took the house and torched it down to the foundation. Had to rebuild.
And things have worked out better than I could have imagined. Have a little faith.
I heard a story of how they capture monkeys. They put a banana in a box with a small hole in it. The monkey will put their hand in the hole and grab the banana.
They can’t get the banana out through the hole. It’s stuck, but they won’t let go. Even when the hunters come to capture them, they won’t let go.
You can’t save yourself if you don’t let go of the banana. If it was meant for you, it wouldn’t be in that box. You’d be able to stroll off with it.
What are you missing out on in life because you refuse to let go of that banana?
Make the choice. The deciding is the hardest part.
Once it’s done, you move forward, you rebuild. And that can be one of the most beautiful experiences you ever have in this life. If you allow it to be.
Let go of the banana and rebuild.
You can do this.
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